Call Me Ishmael.
An Abyssinian cat and his accessories.
Monday, July 14, 2014
Ishmael Will Still Wear the Pants
"Walter? Who is he? Oh. These are his 3-month shorts? Then, how do I fit them? I am 7 years old, and I weigh 9.2 lbs. How much is Walter going to weigh? Oh. We will wear the same size? At least I have a new bassinet out of this whole thing. Oh. Walter's bassinet. Well, I still wear the pants in this family."
Wednesday, June 4, 2014
Friday, May 23, 2014
Tuesday, May 13, 2014
Protect This Mouse
In spite his dutifully good manners and slight sashay, Ishmael knows how to be a feral beast.
Sometimes it is him swiping a neatly tied beef tenderloin ($57) off the counter and then letting the blood drip down his chin as he swings it from side to side.
(I washed the piece he didn't eat and retied it, thank you very much.)
But, more often, he runs around proudly with a piece of "can I have a little to-go bag for my cat?" tuna sashimi hanging out of his mouth or an Ishmael-size portion of the center of Mommy's ribeye.
Twice, however, he's had the joy of hunting and killing a mouse and then playing "keep my [prize] away from Mommy."
This includes:
1. Hiding the mouse under the ottoman and then sauntering casually away as if nothing's happened.
2. Maniacally throwing the mouse into the air and then swinging his arm like a bat about 5 times in a row.
3. Attacking Mommy like a wildebeest with no recognition of the parental-cat bond in hopes of keeping the [prize] for a little bit longer.
Wait, what? There is a mouse by my bottom? |
Wednesday, May 7, 2014
Pepper Steak
Then, I had a little lick from his toothbrush.
Too far, Ishmael, too far.
Monday, April 28, 2014
A Reunion
Ishmael missed Daddy so much while Daddy was on his business trip.
Now, let's get back to our business, he says.
Thursday, April 10, 2014
Batty for Electronics
Tuesday, April 1, 2014
Chore Day Tuesday
Tuesdays get to be too much for Ishamel.
It's chore day,
and his responsibilities range from
composing and performing six sad songs,
to nibbling the orchid buds,
to taste-testing the butter.
Later, he'll trade one of the sad songs for a damp washcloth and a blowout.
Friday, March 28, 2014
Friday, March 21, 2014
Tuesday, March 4, 2014
Light Reading
Since finding out about the arrival of his human baby brother in 20 weeks, Ishmael has taken up a new hobby.
This was his first selection.
Thursday, February 27, 2014
Wednesday, January 29, 2014
Guest Blogger: Puzzle Machine
I do my puzzle.
Oh, your puzzle? Yes, I do your puzzle.
I lay in my box.
Bathroom Rules
1. Come in; I sit on your lap.
2. You will not lock me out. This is my time.
3. If you don't let me sit on your lap, I practice my spins and twirls at your feet while I sing my sad sad songs.
4. If you hush me or refuse to pet me, I make toilet paper confetti.
5. I help you pet me by grabbing your hands with my hands.
6. Before you leave, please put me on the scale. My ideal weight is 9.2 pounds.
7. I drink out of the toilet on occasion, but you are not to observe me. It's the "found water" concept, and you need to respect the hunt.
Friday, January 24, 2014
8 More Days
Just a reminder: the Baltimore Ravens are Super Bowl Football Champions of the World for 8 more days.
Love, Ishmael
Saturday, January 18, 2014
Wednesday, January 15, 2014
No Hats. Just Limin'.
Wednesday, December 18, 2013
Phresh Lettuce
Refusing to let a piece of iceberg go to waste, Ishmael quickly fashioned himself a fresh cap.
"The kids are saying phresh," he tells me.
Monday, December 16, 2013
Sheepskin Pajamas
Ishmael gets tucked in next to Mommy's head every night.
He would prefer not to show everyone what his pajamas look like.
He knitted them himself out of sheepskin that he harvested from his friend Bartholomew.
Wednesday, December 4, 2013
Tuesday, December 3, 2013
Monday, December 2, 2013
Bohannon Fan
Lately, the household has been enjoying the Hell on Wheels series on AMC.
I have not seen one bandanna on the show.
Ishmael sees things differently.
Wednesday, November 27, 2013
Quiet Time with Daddy
Sometimes, Ishmael does not feel well.
He feels better in the safety of his cone hat nest.
And even better when Daddy puts the alligator on the wall.
Tuesday, November 26, 2013
Monday, November 25, 2013
Cold in the Ravens Suite
He did not mind bundling up to go to the Ravens game this weekend.
He was invited to the suite, where he stayed warm with fried chicken and soft pretzels.
Thursday, November 21, 2013
Not Invited to Tgiving?
I told Ishmael he was not invited to Willard Thanksgiving.
He considers this a wild injustice.
I asked him why, thinking it was because the dogs wereinvitedandhewasnot!
He said, I've made myself a cornhat in anticipation of attending.
Superstitious Ish
Ishmael feels more comfortable cheering for the Ravens while wearing his handkerchief.
His refusal to wash it has not contributed to a winning season this year...
but he thinks the luck will turn any day now.
This is the photo that started it all.
Justin came home from work early one day.
Ishmael clearly was not expecting anyone to be home.
He had wrapped this heart-pattern cloth napkin around his head.
And was tidying the kitchen.
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